Notes

Dear Beckett,
If you started crawling or walking, you (and everyone else) would be a lot happier. Talking would also be cool. These are all things to do before you insist on feeding yourself with a fork. Just saying...there's an order.

Dear Size 2 Pencil Skirt,
When I walk in the closet, am I hearing you laughing at me or crying with me?

Dear UCLA Extension,
This year I'm going to take a writing class. I'm serious this time. Maybe. Hopefully.

Dear Alex,
Thank you for going to the store for me. You had a long day too.

Dear Hamilton,
Please listen more and whine less.

Dear iMovie,
Thank you for helping me produce videos that remind me that my boys are awesome and I'm pretty darn lucky.

Dear Laundry,
Please slow down your production. Geez.

Dear Office,
You're almost done. I promise not to leave you not-quite-finished.

Dear Mascara,
Miss you. See you in a couple weeks...with my own eyes!

Dear Scotland and Ireland,
Thank you for being so consistent at producing bands I like.

I stumbled on this card this morning in the midst of some office reorganization and discovered, as I often do, that I am so grateful for my mom and will always be broken-hearted she's not here.

Vision

When I was in middle school, glasses were "in" as an accessory, so when I told my mom I thought I needed glasses, she dismissed it as a tricky way to get trendy. Her suspicions were probably well-founded. I mean, what girl doesn't want a stylish new accessory? However, while messing around and trying on my friend Autumn's glasses, I discovered the mystery of how students in the back row could see what I couldn't from the second row. I was nearsighted. After getting my first pair of glasses, I experienced the same revelatory drive home as everyone else does: Oh my gosh! Leaves! I can read billboards! Quick...point to something and ask me what it is! This is a miracle!!

I wore glasses through high school, when I finally got to enjoy the magic of contact lenses. Of course, the "magic" didn't really happen until I could eventually put them in in less than 20 minutes and without the liberal use of curse words.

I've been grateful for my glasses and contacts over the last two decades. Yes, there have been inconveniences: forgotten lens cases or contact solution on vacation, swimming while worrying about losing a contact, actually losing a contact at Disneyland, having to put contacts in tired eyes to go for an early morning run, trying to find time to see the optometrist....well, okay there are quite a few inconveniences. But not too many when the alternative is basically blindness.

Because I've been wearing glasses and contacts for the majority of my life, nearsightedness has become part of my identity: I'm Kate. I wear glasses.

Well, after toying with the idea for some time, I decided to get LASIK. I was pretty nervous, to say the least, having thoughts like, "Well, at least I went to Disneyland this week. One more time to see it before..." and "How am I going to finally organize this office if I'm blind?!" Despite my fears, I managed NOT to cancel the appointment and had the procedure done yesterday. Everything went fine, and my check-up this morning got the all clear.

Alex has wondered aloud why I don't seem more excited and happy about it. I think it's because it doesn't feel like me. Over the last five years, I've gotten married, changed my last name, had two boys, stopped working, closed my personal bank accounts, and become a Republican. And on top of all that, I now have 20/20 vision.

Who is this person?

I miss reading and analyzing texts. I miss writing. I miss being able to jump out of the car and run inside the store. I miss earning my own money. I miss my silly idealism. And now I kind of miss my nearsightedness.

That said...

I wouldn't trade my boys for a car empty of Goldfish crumbs. Or my married life with sweet Alex for a single one filled with selfish freedom but also the ever-present "Will I ever meet him?" question. Or my stay-at-home mom status for a paycheck and stressful teenagers.

So, maybe....in a few weeks....this girl that can see will feel like me, just like "Honey" and "Mommy" eventually did too.

Backyards

We don't have a backyard. We have a small deck area off the kitchen. This is typical for the pricey South Bay area. When we bought our place, I didn't think it was that big a deal...if I thought about it at all. Now that I'm a mom, however, I covet backyards (and big kitchens) regularly. I become downright hateful when someone on House Hunters makes snide comments about a "tiny" half acre backyard. Grrrr.

On the up side, living here means we get to choose from a variety of "backyards": parks, the beach, aquariums, and, of course, Disneyland. I'm way behind on putting together photos and video from the past, but I promised myself to document and publish our latest trip. So, here it is...